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Deacon Tom Writes,
“How Do I Love You? Let Me Count the Ways”
Third Sunday of Easter, Year C
It takes real courage to admit our mistakes. It takes more courage to move forward and not be paralyzed or held back by them.
Life after Jesus.
After the death of Jesus, Peter appears to have gone back to fishing. Perhaps he was trying to forget those last days: Jesus’ brutal death, his own cowardly denial of his friendship with Jesus, his inability to comprehend Jesus’ mysterious presence in the midst of his disciples. It was just too much for Peter to grasp.
It’s understandable that Peter and the others would return to the life they knew, retreating to a place where it was safe. They picked up where they left off before Jesus called them. They put their energy back into rebuilding their businesses.
But few people could have put that kind of experience behind them and picked up where they left off. Having a personal experience with Jesus leaves a person changed forever—then, and now. There is no going back. The Apostles’ return to the safety of “normal” was very short lived.
The issue was bigger than Peter’s physical and emotional encounter with Jesus. It was a mater of Peter coming to terms with himself, with his own failures and shortcomings, with his own fears and doubts. The Gospel today gives us a privileged view into Peter’s soul-searching and honest self-reflection that led to his confessing his love for Jesus.
Only after this spiritual awakening could Peter forgive himself for his failures and weaknesses, and, most importantly, accept them for what they are: human shortcomings.
Once he came to grips with his inner demons, he was ready to move forward. He was able to accept Christ’s forgiveness, to forgive himself, and to embrace the work that Jesus gave him to do, “Feed my sheep.”
Peter embraced this new mission with a renewed enthusiasm fueled by the power of the Holy Spirit. He was then willing and able to lead the Apostles on their mission to “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations…” (Mt. 28.19-20).
He did this at great risk to himself, as we see in the first reading (Acts 5:27-32) as the Apostles challenged the Sanhedrin, the Jewish authorities of the day, ordered them to “stop teaching in that name.” Peter did not “stop teaching.” From that point on, Peter proclaimed the Gospel. He didn’t repeat his earlier denial and mistakes. His humanness and mistakes gave him the opportunity for reflection, to come to terms with his values and mission, and to go forward, renewed.
There’s a little Peter in each of us.
Like Peter, many of us have had our ups and downs in our relationship with Jesus. We’ve had our share of doubts and fears. We’ve often disappointed Jesus—and ourselves—by our sinful behavior, our bad choices, by “what we have done and by what we have failed to do.” Over time these actions become like a wedge and sever our relationship with Our Lord and a heavy burden of guilt to ourselves.
But today’s gospel gives us all hope that we can never be far from God’s abundant mercy and forgiveness. As with Peter, Jesus will always come looking for us. He will nourish us physically and spiritually, and he will bring us his healing presence and compassion so that we can begin again, renewed and restored.
Then, it’s up to us to forgive ourselves knowing God has already extended his infinite grace and mercy to us. We can then take up the mantle and begin again.
Easter is the time God renews the whole world. Renewal is what we need most now to give us strength to be like Peter and do our part to “feed my sheep.” This is especially important given the present state of our world. Let us embrace Our Risen Savior’s love and forgiveness and be strengthened and renewed so that we may experience the newness of life brought about through Christ’s suffering and death and subsequent rebirth.
Enjoy the day!
Deacon Tom
Recommended Reading:
Everything Belongs by Fr. Richard Rohr, O.F.M. is the founder of the Center for Action and Contemplation who teaches primarily on incarnational mysticism, nondual consciousness, and contemplation, with a particular emphasis on how these affect the social justice issues of our time.
Recommended Podcast: Catholic Bytes Podcast is a short, dynamic podcast delivering talks on various topics about the Catholic faith for people on the go.
